Sunday, January 30, 2011

In Memory 1997 - 2011

This is the me and the Princess Ryber Sophie.  She was a good dog and we got to love her for more than 13 years.   Yesterday we laid her to rest deep in the forest, in a special box we made just for her.  The house is quieter than it should be.  And my heart is broken.

Thursday, January 27, 2011


In my whole life I have never done anything as special as being a teacher.  It is hard work, often messy and always never ending.  But there is just something so heart-rendering about these connections I get to forge with kids.  They make me laugh joyously and at times, cry without restraint.

Today I had to send a bunch of students to the inside room for not completing their homework.  Two of them came back afterwards and gave me very sincere apologies for not doing what they should have done.  And I realized that those words came out of a combination of relationship and respect.  When school works, its foundation is relationship and respect.  It works because these two things do not flow out of a system dictated from the top down but rather something very special that grows from the bottom up.  We teachers live for moments such as these as they validate all the other moments of the hard, the messy and the never ending.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Sometimes you figure out before it is too late that the someone you thought you wanted, you don't.  And after that you must go on rejoicing!  Because the universe has given you new eyes through which to see the world.

Friday, January 21, 2011


"It's what you attach yourself to that pulls your cart." George Breed

Monday, January 17, 2011

Equal and Opposite Force

Today I had a small epiphany while teaching science (bridge structure).

Life can basically be summed up as the balancing of opposing forces such as tension and compression.  Each is the corrolary to the other.  It is a very dynamic aspect of life that holds everything in its perfect place.  And keeps us from becoming complacent.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

The World Through New Eyes

Can you love without possession?

Over coffee this morning I was recapping to Jeremy on the book "The Alchemist".  I've read this book many times. On the surface it is about a boy on a journey to find his destiny (a treasure at the base of the pyramids in Egypt).  During his travels across the desert the caravan he is with stops at an oasis.  Here he meets a girl and falls in love with her and considers giving up his pursuit of destiny to be with her.

"I came to tell you just one thing" the boy said.  "I want you to be my wife.  I love you." .... "I'm a desert woman and I'm proud of that.  I want my husband to wander as free as the wind that shapes the dunes.  And, if I have to I will accept the fact that he has become a part of the clouds, and the animals and the water of the desert."

As much as their love was mutual, she did not wish for him to give up on the pursuit of his destiny.  In fact, it was the ardent pursuit of his dreams that had drawn her to him.  Soon after this he leaves the oasis and continues to travel to the pyramids, the Alchemist accompanying him as a teacher and guide.  They encounter many dangers along the way, to which the boy comments on how his beginner's luck seems to have run out.  To which the Alchemist says:

"What you still need to know is this: before a dream is realized, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way.  It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realizing our dreams, master the lessons we've learned as we move toward that dream.  That's the point at which most people give up."

This book has many lessons, most metaphorical, that can be applied to every readers life, regardless of where you see yourself along the journey.  What has resonated with me this time through is the idea of love without boundaries.  Can I love and be loved so unselfishly as to not hinder you from the pursuit of your journey?  Can I love and be loved so fearlessly, that no matter how dangerous or far reaching our journeys are calling, I can go and let you go, for both of our great good?  Can I love you just because I love you?  And know that our bond is not a boundary but rather the very thing that makes us a part of the others dream, our connection to the very Soul of the World, where everything is written by the same hand.


There are lots of people out there doing great things.  Things that can make the rest of us a little jealous  ~ either at their creativity of ideas or their ballsyness to actually pursue their ideas and aspirations.  And certainly at the success and smile they can't keep off their face.

Look to them for inspiration.  But write your own story.

Sunday, January 09, 2011

Innate Knowledge

"Your inner guidance knows exactly what your heart’s desire is. When you open your mouth and remove the brakes—and get the judge out of your head for a minute—your inner guidance will come up with the right answers."   Christiane Northrup, M.D.

Monday, January 03, 2011


Everywhere I turn, people are setting goals and extolling their resolutions.  Astrologically, today (Jan 3) due to Jupiter and Uranus being in a triple conjunction (true I don't really know what any of that means), it is apparently the best day of the year to set out the goals you desire to accomplish in 2011.

I don't really have goals for this year yet.  Ideas, yes.  Goals in and of themselves, No.

This past week I've had several premonitions and just before drifting off to sleep Thursday past, I was given some words that came to me so strongly I had to get out of bed and write them down.  Maybe these are just fanciful things, my active imagination ~ oh I do hope so!  As one of many things I wish to cultivate is my fanciful imagination.  And I suppose when it gets down to brass tacks, I want to explore this through writing and creativity of some sort or another.

As I move into this year, my eyes and my heart are open.   I'm determined to not be afraid but to pursue the very things that make me question whether or not I can!  Because I know I can, even if it feels uncomfortable for the first bit.  Last August when I went to see an Intuitive, she told me a part of me was hiding in the shadows and that it is time to free her.  I've been thinking about this blonde haired, blue eyed girl that stares at the floor, her hands tangled in a shimmery satin ivory dress.  One of my quests is to help her come join the party that's happening just around the corner.  It constricts my chest a little bit, makes me feel like I'm talking myself down off a ledge where she is concerned. Perhaps what we all fear most is the challenge to make the most of ourselves.  What else is there in this life?

I am confident that my life's experience is unfolding as it is intended for me.  I was born under a special cosmic sky and there are bridges to be crossed and crosses to bear.  There is also beauty and joy to enter into, to be soaked up like sun and rain in equal measures.  I want to receive all it has to offer with graciousness and gratitude.

Saturday, January 01, 2011


My Life Path number in Numerology is 11.  So given that today is 1/1/11, I'm already feeling like I'm ahead of the game.  :D  My expectations are high and I'm not going to waiver from these convictions!

I have no resolutions to offer you today.  The only thing you will find here is my joy, optimism and determination to love my life through its myriad of peaks and valleys.

Happy New Year my friends.  Thank you for the many times you have stopped this way along your travels.  Continued blessings on your journey through 2011.