Last Night

painting by Carol Buchman - Meditation

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I wanted to share a meditation that I did last night before going to bed.

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Before I begin I always set the timer on the stove, last night I set it for 20 minutes. I find the timer is very freeing as it allows me to be much more present in the moment. It is one less thing my mind has to worry or fret or think about.

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I lit a single tea light and wrapped myself in a soft and cozy throw. I sat half lotus on the sofa. For the next several minutes I alternated two mantras. With a full cycle of breath, both the inhale and the exhale, I focused on 'ease in my body'. As I did this, I just allowed my mind and my breath to scan my body looking for areas of discomfort or tension, and then releasing those areas as they arose. On the next cycle of breath, I focused on 'ease in my mind'. Again, searching and releasing any thoughts.

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For me, meditation is much easier if I have an area of thought to attend to - hence the mantra. I readily found places of 'dis-ease' or dis-comfort in both my body and mind and was successful at dissolving their effect. I don't always have success but last night I did. Even though my head was in a normal forward facing position, soon I noticed that it felt heavy and light at the same time - as though all tension in my neck had been erased. I also generated a lot of body heat which I found surprising. I believe that the body can heal itself and that meditation can energize the process - the meditation felt very healing to me. I was not seeking to increase my energy but rather to quiet any excess, sluffing off the residue of the day.

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Meditation is a wonderful discipline but it does take time to cultivate. Where once I was unable to achieve success for even 1 minute (or less), I am now able to do so for about 12 minutes. It is very helpful to approach it as though you are an observer to your own mind. This is also the beginning of seeing yourself apart from your ego. Let your thoughts be like clouds that float by but do not change the sky. Let them become light and unaffecting. Cultivate forgiveness for all your imperfections and do not judge yourself for your negative thoughts.

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Namaste. Angela

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"Let go of all that does not serve you."

Life

This is my nephew Brady and niece Ava. I stole the picture off my sister's blog. It made me so homesick I wanted to fly home immediately and be a part of the whole crazy show.

The Year Ahead...

In 2008 I am going to take charge of my financial life. I'm going to learn to invest and do it apart from a paid advisor - none of whom ever got me a decent return on my dollars. I've grown tired of reading books on pseudo religious themes and self improvement. Lately it seems I've nothing left to learn from this stream (book wise) and keep running over the same words and thoughts rearranged by new authors. I'm starting to think that this is as good as I get, spiritually speaking. Now I need to take those lessons and apply them to real life in a conscious manner. After all, being conscious is the key.

So from this point on, this blog stops being about my self-awareness crusade. Not that I haven't enjoyed the ride, on the contrary it has been great. And although the ride's not over - I may even blog about the spirituality of money - it is time for a new focus, to learn some new things. And hopefully make a little money along the way!

calm

"Saw the world turning in my sheets

and once again, I cannot sleep.

Walk out the door and up the street;

look at the stars beneath my feet.

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And so I sent some men to fight,

and one came back at dead of night.

Said he'd seen my enemy.

Said he looked just like me."

James Blunt

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"Let go of that which does not serve you."

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"Open yourself to something greater."

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